Friday, April 07, 2006

I think

I'm a different girl now.  Woman.  Whatever.  Too hard to explain, or perhaps inexplicable.  However, I feel I some sort of change has come over me.  Maybe I've been listening to too much Garbage.  But I can't help but feel that I'm not myself, but somehow a different self.  I need time to work it out.  Or maybe time itself will work it out.  But I'm not who I was anymore.  I need time away.  Time to write, to record.  Time to myself.  Time to my self.

Change sucks.  It leaves damage and victims.  What's the price of growing old?  What's the price of growing, knowing how many people get left behind in the wake?  When you're faced with a choice, is it a foregone conclusion that your decision is the right one?  Because I have definitely made a lot of bad ones and I don't want to have to take that risk anymore.  Yet, obviously, that's a very naive point of view.

Maybe it's easier to fuck it all up.  If that's what you're familiar with, it's not a blind spot.  And one has to be good at something.

4 What'd you say?

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I sit here during lunch on another feature, glance at my phone and decide to load up the blog that is so often full of the ramblings of a former co-worker.

To my surprise, today resembles more of a suicide note then a typical blog entry, or perhaps the lyrics to the next hit song?

In either case, strange. You are strange.

Get recording.

-Dave the guy that tried to be a PA and failed.

(Ill never PA again after Fortune)

4:17 PM, April 07, 2006  
Blogger Gabe said...

You are the single most wonderful person I know. So there.

You're the best...AROUND!

4:16 PM, April 08, 2006  
Blogger Nick said...

Who loves ya? That's right...I do. Just smile, you're beautiful, talented, and intelligent.

8:41 AM, April 10, 2006  
Anonymous Chris Field said...

Doing a little metaphysical house-cleaning to those who have sparked me and left me with some sort of "loose end"...and I came to look for you online. Found your blog here. I wish you the best and I hope you clear away the snows of disillusionment and future fears and find the path that has always been at your feet and follow it truly. You deserve good thing, Brenda and I hope they find you before you tuck yourself back away again..

9:56 PM, April 21, 2006  

Post a Comment

<< Home